Is it strange that I was glad to know that I'm dying??
Question: I thought that I'm going to die. So I was reliefed. And Happy. I was in emotional pain.
I hate myself the way I am. Everything What I did, Who I am, How I look. I feel guilty and desperate So I was happy that it's gonna end.
But since I heard from my doctor that I'm okay I feel so sad. (He seemed wondering why I looks sad so I had to make fake smile!)
I can't kill myself cause it's wrong and persnally I believe suicide is just same as murder so If I kill myself I can't go to the heaven. Its really sucks, isn't it?
Do you think it's unreasonable? Can somebody understand what I feels like?
And Plus, Everyone gonna die somehow someday anyway, So am I. Than isn't it better just end this pain quickly?
Answers: Emotional pain is hard to cure. We can't see it, and some don't even believe it is there because they have not experienced it.
I feel your pain along with a gazillion others. I believe you, and I believe in you. You will not die until you are called to go. So get up, stand up! and seems like you given into fear,and want to fly the coop. Your rational brain is there, but it is not as strong as you emotional brain. Work hard to bring the rational to the front of you and believe in your strength to fight.
Please go see a counselor. It sounds as if you may be depressed. You don't need to feel the way you do and if you get some help you won't feel this way.
You really need to seek help!!
Yeah, I mean if you were going to die it absolves you of any responsibilities to better your life since you were going to die and probably people would end up feeling sorry for you. Since your alive it's like you're life is as boring as it once was unless you do something about it. What you did is in the past you can't change it really unless you apologize to those you hurt otherwise get over it, What you look like you can change to a degree but beyond that try and view yourself in a more positive light, you're probably more hung up on your looks than everyone else is, Who you are you can change and you should be thankful that you get a chance to do that...go back to school, take night classes if you want to do something different or take up a hobby, I don't know but considering you have a computer you have more than a lot of people on earth have and should be greatful for it...I understand you don't like yourself but I realized a while ago that is something that I alone can change and it is something that is within your reach too, people overcome amazing odds when they have too especially those with disabilities so you have a leg up on them and what if you had a slow debilitating disease that took 10 years before you would die, would you like death so much then? probably not, go visit a cancer ward of children's hospital and be thankful to be alive
you have not specified your age so no one can decide really
If you are elderly, try finding a friend or partner that can accompany you. Or buy a dog or a pet, they always provide endless love.
If you are young, focus on your studies and you'll do fine
well, i think that for an ordinary person its not strange to be glad because you're dying, coz that oly means that your business here on earth is well taken of. but in your situation,
i pity you because you treat dying as a shortcut to heaven. that's not good. its not an escape pad that you could hide when you have problems. you have to solveeverything first before you could be glad that your dying. its really so pathetic if people took dying as an option for escape and not as a final destination in the future.
maybe you should look at life in a different angle, so that you could relieve the pain your goin' thru right now. remember that you should'nt die just because you need to but because its destined for you to happen.
The hard battle of life is to make it worth living, and it is. what you are feeling can be a common side effect of depression, obviously your religion prevents you from killing yourself where many in your position would, can you not get solice from this religion to pick your life up? i hope you are in councelling as you need help.
you get one life don't count on it being better afterwards as there is no guarentee work on making this life whatever you can, it sounds like you need to take some time out of life and re-establish your priorities, once you can see what you want from life then you can work on how you achieve it, but remember a few important things.
1. Life is worth living - you just have to work out how.
2. You are not alone - many people have gone through what you are going through.
3. As long as you have your health nothing else matters.
remember you will get through this if you don't give up.
Take Care
bungle
My fatherinlaw and I were having this very conversation a few days ago. Some people would just rather know when and how they are going to die, that is normal. But if you are just wanting death, That is not. You could be very depressed. YOu should talk to your doctor and see if he/she could point you in the direction of a counsilor. And go to church. You mentioned Heaven in you question. Get involved in a church. It will give you somewhere to place your energy, plus a closer relationship to god is always a good thing. It always helps. I used to be pagan, and I was always depressed. Then I met the love of my life, and he got me involved in church, and I have never been happier. Im not saying my way is the way for everyone, but perhaps it could help you.
Well im atheistic so i cant really tell u.
It's not that strange. I'd be glad if it was quick and merciful.
The slow and painful death is of no interest to me.
Your were not happy to know you were dying; you're just unhappy with your life. Period. Now, start from there. So, there are structures around you that cause you to be unhappy. What about inside you, isn't there one thing about yourself you enjoy having with, such as your hair, wet and fragrant after your morning bath; your eyes, drinking the colors of the departing sun. Me, I like the feel of pillows and the smell of fresh pillow case, and everytime I experience this I say to myself thank you, Lord, and I don't care anymore if I had been in pain the rest of the day. We only live this life once and yes, someday we all have to die. That is not a tragedy, unless all you have only are the acrid aftertaste of bad memories. Count your blessings, my friend.
I hate myself the way I am. Everything What I did, Who I am, How I look. I feel guilty and desperate So I was happy that it's gonna end.
But since I heard from my doctor that I'm okay I feel so sad. (He seemed wondering why I looks sad so I had to make fake smile!)
I can't kill myself cause it's wrong and persnally I believe suicide is just same as murder so If I kill myself I can't go to the heaven. Its really sucks, isn't it?
Do you think it's unreasonable? Can somebody understand what I feels like?
And Plus, Everyone gonna die somehow someday anyway, So am I. Than isn't it better just end this pain quickly?
Answers: Emotional pain is hard to cure. We can't see it, and some don't even believe it is there because they have not experienced it.
I feel your pain along with a gazillion others. I believe you, and I believe in you. You will not die until you are called to go. So get up, stand up! and seems like you given into fear,and want to fly the coop. Your rational brain is there, but it is not as strong as you emotional brain. Work hard to bring the rational to the front of you and believe in your strength to fight.
Please go see a counselor. It sounds as if you may be depressed. You don't need to feel the way you do and if you get some help you won't feel this way.
You really need to seek help!!
Yeah, I mean if you were going to die it absolves you of any responsibilities to better your life since you were going to die and probably people would end up feeling sorry for you. Since your alive it's like you're life is as boring as it once was unless you do something about it. What you did is in the past you can't change it really unless you apologize to those you hurt otherwise get over it, What you look like you can change to a degree but beyond that try and view yourself in a more positive light, you're probably more hung up on your looks than everyone else is, Who you are you can change and you should be thankful that you get a chance to do that...go back to school, take night classes if you want to do something different or take up a hobby, I don't know but considering you have a computer you have more than a lot of people on earth have and should be greatful for it...I understand you don't like yourself but I realized a while ago that is something that I alone can change and it is something that is within your reach too, people overcome amazing odds when they have too especially those with disabilities so you have a leg up on them and what if you had a slow debilitating disease that took 10 years before you would die, would you like death so much then? probably not, go visit a cancer ward of children's hospital and be thankful to be alive
you have not specified your age so no one can decide really
If you are elderly, try finding a friend or partner that can accompany you. Or buy a dog or a pet, they always provide endless love.
If you are young, focus on your studies and you'll do fine
well, i think that for an ordinary person its not strange to be glad because you're dying, coz that oly means that your business here on earth is well taken of. but in your situation,
i pity you because you treat dying as a shortcut to heaven. that's not good. its not an escape pad that you could hide when you have problems. you have to solveeverything first before you could be glad that your dying. its really so pathetic if people took dying as an option for escape and not as a final destination in the future.
maybe you should look at life in a different angle, so that you could relieve the pain your goin' thru right now. remember that you should'nt die just because you need to but because its destined for you to happen.
The hard battle of life is to make it worth living, and it is. what you are feeling can be a common side effect of depression, obviously your religion prevents you from killing yourself where many in your position would, can you not get solice from this religion to pick your life up? i hope you are in councelling as you need help.
you get one life don't count on it being better afterwards as there is no guarentee work on making this life whatever you can, it sounds like you need to take some time out of life and re-establish your priorities, once you can see what you want from life then you can work on how you achieve it, but remember a few important things.
1. Life is worth living - you just have to work out how.
2. You are not alone - many people have gone through what you are going through.
3. As long as you have your health nothing else matters.
remember you will get through this if you don't give up.
Take Care
bungle
My fatherinlaw and I were having this very conversation a few days ago. Some people would just rather know when and how they are going to die, that is normal. But if you are just wanting death, That is not. You could be very depressed. YOu should talk to your doctor and see if he/she could point you in the direction of a counsilor. And go to church. You mentioned Heaven in you question. Get involved in a church. It will give you somewhere to place your energy, plus a closer relationship to god is always a good thing. It always helps. I used to be pagan, and I was always depressed. Then I met the love of my life, and he got me involved in church, and I have never been happier. Im not saying my way is the way for everyone, but perhaps it could help you.
Well im atheistic so i cant really tell u.
It's not that strange. I'd be glad if it was quick and merciful.
The slow and painful death is of no interest to me.
Your were not happy to know you were dying; you're just unhappy with your life. Period. Now, start from there. So, there are structures around you that cause you to be unhappy. What about inside you, isn't there one thing about yourself you enjoy having with, such as your hair, wet and fragrant after your morning bath; your eyes, drinking the colors of the departing sun. Me, I like the feel of pillows and the smell of fresh pillow case, and everytime I experience this I say to myself thank you, Lord, and I don't care anymore if I had been in pain the rest of the day. We only live this life once and yes, someday we all have to die. That is not a tragedy, unless all you have only are the acrid aftertaste of bad memories. Count your blessings, my friend.
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